Alcohol, this is my first blog and I want you to understand this is going to be hard for me to break it off. I’m the girl who doesn’t leave your side until early hours of the morning. I love the way you make me feel and how you help me to forget all my cares and stresses in the world. But I’m starting to question your intentions, what about the morning after?
My mouth is dry, my head is pounding and I know in 10 minutes my body is going to be smothered with anxiety. I grasp a glass of water, which is sitting beside my bed, well at least I had prepared myself for what is to come. I feel the trickles of warm water down my throat and there is no sense of relief that I fantasised. My mouth feels disgusting like it’s been drained from any saliva I once had. My lips are dry and raw. My body feels like it has been in a car crash and I am reeking of sweat and alcohol.
I see my phone from the corner of my eye. Well at least I managed to get it home. Then dread suddenly takes over, I don’t want to even think about who I messaged and dialled in the early hours of the morning. I am certain whoever was on the receiving end won’t be impressed today. Flash backs come back to me from the night, I feel sick. Did I really say those things? Did I really act that way? I want to devour my blanket and wrap myself up so no one can see me. I see the sun peeking in, I put my head under my pillow. Today I want to slip away and pretend I don’t exist.